Dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish.
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I didn't say it was your fault; I said I was blaming you.
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Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars but check when you say the paint is wet?
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Why do Americans choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America ?
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Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.
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A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
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You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.
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The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some good ideas!
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Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.
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A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip.
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Hospitality: making your guests feel like they're at home, even if you wish they were.
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