Friday, December 13, 2013

Cartoons for Christmastime .... Obama and Santa


Conan O'Brien's jokes and pokes at Obama .... 5


"One of President Obama's goals tonight is to win back female voters. Which explains why Obama is going to answer every question with a passage from 'Fifty Shades of Grey.'" –Conan O'Brien

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"The Obama campaign is releasing a new ad showing Americans whose financial situation has improved over the past four years. Unfortunately, the only person who appears in the ad is Mitt Romney." –Conan O'Brien

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"Conservatives are now criticizing President Obama because as a child in Indonesia he sometimes ate dog meat. But on the plus side, Obama is now polling very well among cats." –Conan O'Brien

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Cartoon ... Obamacare fixed by Obama's finger


Conan O'Brien's jokes and pokes at Obama ..... 4

"Donald Trump said he'd give $5 million to charity if President Obama released his college transcripts. Obama responded by sending Trump a full transcript from his alma mater, the University of Shove It Up Your Ass." –Conan O'Brien

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"Tonight President Obama and Mitt Romney hold their final debate in Boca Raton, Florida. The topic of the debate is what is more shocking to see in Boca Raton, a Mormon or a black guy." –Conan O'Brien

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"Endorsements are rolling in. The Atheist Party has endorsed Obama for president. When told the news Obama said, 'Thank God.'" –Conan O'Brien

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Christmas Group Therapy


Conan O'Brien's jokes and pokes at Obama .... 3

"Some Republicans are saying that due to his current scandals, President Obama should be impeached. In response, Obama laughed and said, 'Two words fellas: President Biden.'" --Conan O'Brien

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"President Obama's inauguration is coming up. During next week's inauguration, he will be sworn in with not one, but two Bibles. Relax, Mr. President. We get it. You're not a Muslim. You're overcompensating." –Conan O'Brien

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Cartoons for Christmastime .... Santa and Reindeer .... 4


Conan O'Brien's jokes and pokes at Obama ..... 2

"Syria's President Assad referred to President Obama as weak. Obama is so angry he plans to ask Congress for permission to come up with a good comeback." –Conan O'Brien

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"This weekend President Obama celebrated his 52nd birthday. For his birthday, Michelle Obama jumped out of a cake and told him he's not allowed to have any." –Conan O'Brien

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Cartoons for Christmastime .... Santa and Reindeer .... 3


Conan O'Brien's Obama jokes and pokes .... 1


"In a speech today President Obama called for a new era of bipartisan cooperation. He said this because Obama likes to start off a speech with a joke.” –Conan O'Brien

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"President Obama said the day after the budget deal is made he's going to concentrate on immigration. He says he'll start by deporting Ted Cruz." –Conan O'Brien

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Cartoons for Christmastime ... Santa and Reindeer ... 2


The beauty in married life


If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say -- talk in your sleep.
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Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.

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First guy says, 'My wife's an angel!' Second guy remarks, 'You're lucky, mine's still alive.'

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A Woman's Prayer:
Dear Lord, I pray for: Wisdom, To understand a man , to Love and to forgive him,
and for patience, For his moods. Because Lord, if I pray for Strength I'll just beat him to death'

Cartoons for Christmastime .... Santa and Reindeer .... 1


All seeing blind man

Husband and wife are waiting at the bus stop with their nine children.
A blind man joins them after a few minutes. When the bus arrives, they find it overloaded and only the wife and the nine kids are able to fit onto the bus.

So the husband and the blind man decide to walk. 


After a while, the husband gets irritated by the ticking of the stick of the blind man as he taps it on the sidewalk, and says to him:
 'Why don't you put a piece of rubber at the end of your stick? That ticking sound is driving me crazy.'

The blind man replies, 'If you had put a rubber at the end of YOUR stick, we'd be riding the bus, so shut the hell up.'